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Nonprofitabletech.com

by Michael C. Gilbert, April 1, 2001

Just before April 1st, the staff of The Gilbert Center, Social Ecology, and some of our partners got something off their chest. The result was Nonprofitabletech.com. It's a site that captures many of the things that we've all known were wrong with the huge dotcom venture into the nonprofit sector.

The scary things for me about this site are (1) it's way too close for comfort and (2) the issues it addresses may have slowed down just a little, but show no sign of stopping.

I know I don't need to spell the issues out here. Just take a look at the site and enjoy some of the comments that people have shared. You'll see what we mean.

First, there are the testimonials to the accuracy of this parody:

I LOVE it!!! I think I've had clients who've tried to do business with these guys!!! I'm sharing it with them! I'm also tempted to send it to some who think they ARE these guys!

You should win an award for this one... it is RIGHT ON TARGET and started my Monday off perfectly! Thanks, I am still ROFL....

You hit the nail right on the head! Your take-off on the way tech consultants exploit non-profit execs' panic over information technology and their inferiority complex in regard to the for-profit sector . . . I couldn't stop laughing!!

yeah, my wife's agency dealt with an outfit that was almost your "poster child" for the satire.

One of the funniest satires I have seen! Except that having a comments section that actually works is completely inappropriate to the site. Remember that your company is the source of all business intelligence about the new world, so you don't need anybody else's comments, let alone those of potential sucker ^h^h^h^h^h^h clients!

BRILLIANT. I just posted it to CYB-ACC. Love you madly.

Nonprofitabletech.com MADE my day. Hit waaaay too close for comfort here, I can tell you.

Nonprofitable was incredibly hilarious. I always wondered how coffee proof my keyboard was--after bursting out laughing with the mouthful of coffee, I now know.

Omigosh - you get it!

There are the people who replied in kind:

We are a small group of NPOs using technology. We don't want to rely on volunteers (we can't trust them even if they have skill). We want people with knowledge and know what they are doing (but we can't pay them anything). In general we are fearful of technology, and probably won't be able to implement anythng you suggest. Can you send more information on your FREE, FREE, FREE service. We have about 15 souls not worth much to exchange for this.

I'd like to order three copies of your freeware. We have Apple ][+s, with language cards. Will it work? And, can we get one of them in green? Thanks in advance.

There were the wonderful job applicants:

I surfed with interest your website. and would like to be considered for a position with your fine company. I have experience working for just such an enterprise (although I am sure it was not as well off as yours), and am especially adept at thoughfully considering the fact that while I have more than 20 years experience working with non profits, that is not as impresssive as having a hand held e-mail device I can use to zone out of meetings that bore me. Also, I have learned that to express doubt about an unworkable concept is an example of "negative thinking", and I certainly won't try that again. My technical skills include operating spell check.

I am an excellent manager who recognizes the brilliant future of this new and innovative service. [sgl dagger]I will forward my resume as soon as I can cut and paste one together from those of many various associates. [sgl dagger]Strength and honor, my comrades of the computer!

Due to my huge success as a grantwriter, I think that you would be honored to have me aboard. I will accept a bio[sgl dagger]about your non-profit and then make a decision based on money, money and more money. I will accept a base salary, monthly bonuses, a company porche, unlimited access to the company VISA card, and a healthy Christmas bonus. A yearly trip to Hawaii with ten of my nearest and dearest would be nice. I am only accepting company bio's until the end of this month. So your time is limited. A word about me. I am considered a bulldog, relentless in my pursuit of the foundation dollar. I am ruthless but still capable of retaining a sense of humility.

MWM, willing to relocate, seeking Mucho Moola for as little work as possible. Am inteligent, am entrepreneurial (have started 16 businesses which have failed), and have a passion for changing the world especially in the area of having to stand in lines and using cell phones on airplanes. If you were really charitable you'd hire me.

Hi Guys, Thanks for giving me an opportunity to apply for work at your company. I would have attached my resume, but I forgot how to. I will send a copy of my picture as soon as the guy at the gate gives me my stuff back. Have I worked for you before?

And finally, some of the people who thought we were serious or who couldn't tell:

SO?

Unscribe!

Is this site for real or is it some weird joke?

are you serious???????

Have looked at your website but still unclear as to what you do. Kindly clarify your services to nonprofits for the purpose of listing in the Information Technology section of my nonprofit directory's new edition.

I got no information from this web site. How do you help non profit organizations?

 
To me, their responses are the most telling. Don't you think?

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